Writing a blog is easy when other people do it for you

Aaron: So what is Earth Day Anyways... Explain it....

Jimmy:

You laugh at the earth for being dumb and not killing humans yet. I usually enjoy this holyest of days by burning trash, cutting down a few small helpless trees melting plastic and spraying airosal cans into the sky. So remember kids steal your parents keys and start up that suv because its earth day

HPD does not equal HDP

all i wanted to say was:
heilbrun prom date does not equal hands down pants

Word of the Week

Bust + Testicles = Busticles

(As in: That party was a bust, not in terms of ejaculation)

This Girl Thinks She's Going to Medical School

This conversation occurred after I told her only small asian girls could get admitted to medical school

Michael

you didnt see the new law that got passed?

12:37amNicole

which?

12:37amMichael

well, since medical schools are so crowded

12:38amNicole

oh fuck you, youre being sarcastic

12:38amMichael

they are now only letting in small people

12:38amNicole

HAHA

12:38amMichael

and males are too aggressive for most medical fields

i.e. pediatrician

12:38amNicole

haha

12:39amMichael

and since asian people only eat rice, they dont have to worry about feeding them in residency

so

the only people that get let in are small asian girls

12:39amNicole

ahaha

youre ridiculous

but also hilarious, i'll admit

12:41amMichael

i know

you're better off for knowing me

12:42amNicole

haha

we'll see about that

and if youre business

enjoy your cubicle

which will eventually lead to an office

12:43amMichael

corner office

12:43amNicole

that will continue to have four walls and maybe a window for the rest of your career

12:43amMichael

with a hot secretary

12:43amNicole

and you can stew in your insanely individualistic lifestyle

where you follow a type of politics known only to the businessman

know as the "i dont really care what happens in the rest of the world as long as im making money and my stocks are doing well"

12:45amMichael

yea how did you know?

live in a gated community away from the riff raff

trophy wife

2.2 kids

12:45amNicole

ew

12:46amMichael

well not literally 2.2 kids

its a statistic

but if i have a kid thats a midget

that is totally cool with me

12:46amNicole

oh dont worry, im referring to the gated community and trophy wife

12:46amMichael

i accept all people equall

y

12:46amNicole

haha

12:46amMichael

what is wrong with a gated community and trophy wife

dont you want a trophy husband?

12:46amNicole

im glad you felt the need to assert that

12:46amMichael

or do you want to be a trophy wife?

thats prob the only reason you're going to med school

get your claws into some brain surgeon while he least suspects it

12:47amNicole

gated communities are a waste of money and were created so people could justify living in their own little bubbles of what they want life to be like

not if i get to be the surgeon first

and i want a husband with a brain

12:48amMichael

that you put in his head?

as a brain surgeon

12:48amNicole

which is not something i think of when i hear "trophy husband"

12:48amMichael

slowdown dr frankenstein

12:48amNicole

hahaah

12:50amNicole

well regardless of the guy

i still think gated communities are bullshit

12:50amMichael

why

12:50amNicole

but thats just my opinion

i just told you

^^^^ up there

12:51amMichael

umm

gates can keep minorities out

you've obvi never been to usc

12:52amNicole

aha

lol i havent

but i hate that youre playing devils advocate with me

A Masturbation Joke Turns Into Full Blown Racism

Mar 8

Aaron is i think my shoulder is messd up for life... 10:57pm - Comment - LikeUnlike - Show Feedback (39)Hide Feedback (39)

You like this.

Dave at 11:05pm March 8

Looks like you'll be drinking more beer.

Aaron at 11:06pm March 8

Yea this is going to be a good ass week..

Michael at 11:14pm March 8

another masturbation related injury

Aaron S. at 11:15pm March 8

nah this one was totally this weekend messed me up

Jimmy H at 11:42pm March 8 via Facebook Mobile

Damn mike said it b4 i could

Dave R at 11:46pm March 8

I think it was the strikeout you had today Lapsley... A strikeout in SLOWpitch softball.

Lamer.

Aaron at 11:47pm March 8

I Know I Fail At Life Right Now...

Jimmy at 11:52pm March 8 via Facebook Mobile

Just right now?

Michael at 11:53pm March 8

Damn Jimmy said it b4 i could

Luke at 11:53pm March 8

Sounds like someone was giving you the dutch rudder so hard you popped your shoulder?

Aaron at 11:55pm March 8

yea I tried it yesterday messed it all up

Dave at 11:57pm March 8

Too bad you can't claim workman's comp.. since you need a job for that. haha

Aaron at 11:58pm March 8

ASSHOLE!!! Dude... haha

Luke at 11:58pm March 8

no but he can sue the person who gave him an overly intense dutch rudder. that's assault.

Dave at 11:58pm March 8

Hahaha I love you =)

Dave at 11:59pm March 8

Ever see "To Kill A Mockingbird" ??

The black man never wins in court.

Jimmy at 11:59pm March 8 via Facebook Mobile

Before or after i picked your drunkass up wandering around the gas station... And i totaly stole that bums beach cruzer wanta buy a bike ?

Aaron at 12:00am March 9

Yea Dude i saw that movie and read the book in like 10th Grade...

Jimmy at 12:00am March 9 via Facebook Mobile

Damn you all type to fast

Michael at 12:00am March 9

lapsley's too lazy to run away tho so we dont have to worry about him gettin all shot up by the white man

Luke at 12:02am March 9

this is too crazy 4 me. lol.

Luke at 12:02am March 9

lapsley. have a wonderful day. haha.

Jimmy at 12:03am March 9 via Facebook Mobile

Blacks dont die dave they grow up and with there shifty talk they turn the usa into socilism.. Dream big laps

Michael at 12:06am March 9

black people don't dream, but lapsley really isn't that black so who knows.

Jimmy at 12:13am March 9 via Facebook Mobile

One did, it didnt work out.. God im going to hell for that one

Jimmy at 12:14am March 9 via Facebook Mobile

Fuck whitie now i have redeamed myself

Michael at 12:15am March 9

man that was too easy

Jimmy at 12:18am March 9 via Facebook Mobile

You know me... If its easy..i ll hit it and if she is over six feat its all lapsleys

Aaron at 12:20am March 9

damn bitches why can't you just talk on each others wall...

Jimmy at 12:27am March 9 via Facebook Mobile

Hey you seen that infomercial for smooth away.. You think it will work on my ass?

Michael at 12:28am March 9

lets try lapsley's head first, im sure the curliness is about the same

Aaron at 12:30am March 9

Damn maybe i'll just use you curvy Jew Nose. for some things..

Michael at 12:31am March 9

pffft, whatevs, you know jimmy's nose is way bigger than mine

Aaron at 12:31am March 9

Ok I know that was fucked... but the thing about Black people having no dreams come on you know all they what to do is rap or be a pro athlete of some sort...

Aaron at 12:32am March 9

He nose is bigger...

Jimmy at 12:44am March 9 via Facebook Mobile

You guys suck

Michael at 12:45am March 9

someone can dish it out but can't take it

Aaron at 12:47am March 9

So Mike Looks like your having a good ol' time in that picture...

Fatties

You don't need to punch a fat chick in the face; she's already been punched in the face by god.